Hold on .. Let go

Tis was mother's day on Sunday and I wished my mum gifted her a few flowering plants thought I'd make up for past misbehavior and over the top loafing spree

When I entrusted the plants to her I Said "Amma you have sown the seeds of knowledge , good thoughts and values . Let the plant blossom into a flowering tree, Don't trim it and limit its freedom . You have given it the essentials of sunlight and water let it grow away from your shade"

In all her wisdom and that twinkle in her eye she replied "Chickoo if I let the plant grow without proper care it shall grow hay wire and weeds will get entangled in it.What could be a beautiful flowering tree will look like an ordinary shrub , hence the light in my shade will make it grow stronger" .
I had nothing to say but smiled knowingly that's why they say I'm my mother's girl !

I remember when a few years ago when one of my friend's younger sister happened to be dating someone we both were scandalized and talked about it endlessly and No its not about the guy its about the fact that three yrs back when we were her age we didn't have one !
After talking about it for over an hour we just paused and heard ourselves did we just say "she's too young!" . For someone who's apparently from the same generation we didn't really approve of her young sister's dating just imagine our parents!

No sooner the thought struck our minds we fell silent understanding that mum's in their innate strength just know whats happening in out life and try as we may we cant really fool moms !

When I recollected this incident again I realized that how much we hold on to and how much we let go is independent of the person we are with its more to do about the role we play - Friend,mother,sister,girl friend....
With certain friends I generally coax them to go and explore, fall and learn for themselves. When they ask me for my opinions I ask them to go all out keeping a look out to see if they need my help. With few I'm super protective always warning them time and again, being hawk like and keeping trouble at bay !

In our desire to protect we often alienate. Everyone needs to learn from their follies and failings but more often than not we cant bear to see another repeating the same mistakes that we did hence all the free advice !

Recently my doting family friend who's a good five years younger,who solicits my advice from hairstyles to college admissions, told me that her parents know that she's dating someone and they have already met him !
Quite taken aback I just began to wonder if I'd ever have the guts to do that !
Its a different thing that I haven't really found the person who I could tell my parents about ..but still !

I just heard myself saying "Moni are you guys serious ??"
Now I don't know what did that make me look like but certainly she taught me something that day !
After a satisfactory answer I let the issue drop but I was perturbed should I ask her to hold on to her innocence or must I let her go to explore the world and spread her wings. Its a tough call ! nonetheless Amma's words resonate
You can grow in the light of my shade

PS: Happy Mother's day Amma ! thank god you dont know that I blog ! Would be a great deal of explaining if you read all the posts .