Its all for me - Written a long time ago

The School outside my window lays desolate
Its Navratri holidays...

Coldplay sings telling me the stars shine for me
Yes that what I feel like ...
That the sun beckons me from slumber every morning
the rains wait ready to pour down as soon as i enter shelter
life pauses for me to take a breath and head back inside
All that happens is befitting and special

But evereytime its comes into mind it jades all the beauty
distorts reality and lulls me back into time .....
now the past seems distant but its still there somewhere in shadows
before I begin to understand what I feel
Im back in the moment of now
of how my life is at present and how it still is beautiful as I envisioned and how at peace I feel whenever I think of thee

It is in now that I live in and I love what I feel now

Like a flowing river that starts its journey from a source  flows down crossing pebbles & stones, banks and boulders,  they  navigate her to build dams stagnating her momentarily  yet she finds a way to flow down  to the valley in pursuit of that magic that beckons and allures leading her to cross lands and hills……..

Learning to trust and love again is like that following river even all that transpires through her course she traverses to reach the vast ocean to where she belongs and where she continues to be perennial.

It is in now that I live in and I love what I feel now